Read the fine print before buying 4-wheel drive...

After being out and about following several recent snowstorms, I’m convinced that there must be fine print somewhere in automotive sales contracts that advise buyers that purchasing a 4-wheel drive vehicle requires the buyer to give up all knowledge of the laws of physics that pertain to momentum, as well as most of their common sense when operating the vehicle on snowy or icy roads.

That must be the case, because there can be no other explanation of why those drivers insist on passing everyone else who might be proceeding at a sensible pace or why they have such looks of puzzlement and anger when you pass them off the road in a ditch later. Of course there could be some secret shot of testosterone that is administered to these buyers as part of the vehicle delivery process. That might explain it, too.

I’ve also noted that these same characteristics seem to extend to many snowmobile operators, who somehow come to believe that any snow covered neighborhood street is instantly turned into a snowmobile racecourse. And apparently things like stop signs in those neighborhoods don’t apply to snowmobiles, something that I was unaware of until now. Of course, I’ve observed in Milford that stop signs automatically become “slow down some” signs for even automobile drivers, once it has snowed.

So read the fine print in your next automobile sales contract, especially if you are buying a vehicle with 4-wheel drive capability. And, avoid that proffered cup of coffee. That may be where they slip you the testosterone Mickie. Remember that just because you can go faster in the snow, doesn’t mean that you must. Maybe you can even post a reminder on the visor above the driver’s side that states, “bodies in motion tend to stay in motion”, so that you don’t get lulled into the belief that four wheel drive will let you navigate those slick corners with abandon.